Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
