I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
