Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
