Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
