you would pick up someone in the library
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
