my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Randomize
