i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
