i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
