What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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