Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
