idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
You have to summon your inner elephant
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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