tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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