I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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