it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just want nice things and good sex
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
