don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
