I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
At least make sure they are 18
Why
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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