My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
where am i from again
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
