just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Let's get the cat blown out
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
