So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
