i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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