we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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