And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
We had sex on a dog bed..
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
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