put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
vagina is talking i cant
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm just crazy horny about you
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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