herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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