i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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