yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
