Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
