Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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