so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
