Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
