shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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