opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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