No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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