im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
