problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
