I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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