READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Randomize
