Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
he thought i was a dude.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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