Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
