You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
