but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
