They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
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