The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
