STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
