Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
