Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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