He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I have tasted many bathrooms
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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