I showed him my bush... on skype.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
