my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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