this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
